3/9/12

10 character names


1. Veronica Phalange
2. Toee Polische
3. Jessica Jester
4. Duncan Glazed
5. Rita Icie
6. Kitty Kat
7. Zag Zig
8. Mar Iaa
9. Charlie Horse
10. Richard Ween

3/7/12

10 Great First Lines


1.  I'm always happy until I randomly start crying.
2.  Mom hates drinking, but I drink to drown out her lectures.
3.  Do what you want but run it by me first.
4.  My dog loves to play fetch but I can't throw.
5.  I walked through a cobweb and then turned into a karate master
6.  I really wanted to get to know him until he opened his mouth and started talking.
7.  A broken heart only hurts if you actually loved the person.
8.  I thought you were the one until you kissed my best friend.
9.  I wonder what it's like to swim from a shark?
10. I love buying candles but I hate lighting them.

2/27/12- Exercise 3.9

Voluminous Hair


Blonde, curly, frizzy.
Yes I am talking about my hair.
Please stop saying I'm lucky.
How you wish you had this bush on your head.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to tame this bush
in the morning?
I just want to roll out of bed
and be able to brush the knots out.
But if I brush this thing,
well then out comes the fro.
The longer it grows,
the curlier it gets.
How will I cut it when I am old?
It can't be short!

2/24/12- Exercise 3.10

Modest Proposal

Dear All Colleges,
I have a proposal that's going to help all of us poor kids save a ton of money. Don't go to college. Your prices are absolutely ridiculous and it's not like we're going to get hired anyway due to the shitty job market now a days. So in the future I wouldn't be expecting too many applications from high school seniors because I'm sure they're all going to realize that tuition is just too rich for their blood. You could prevent this and lower the price by a couple thousand dollars or just say bye bye to any money that you were expecting in the near future.

Sincerely,
A poor kid

2/22/12- Prose Poems

Prose Poem 1


Valley Gurl


Like OMG I totally ruined Dante forever.  He like thought I loved him only and I'm all like "Muffin, I do love you but I totally love Britney too." And he's all "Wait, you like girls?" and I'm all "Well girls and you, silly."  And then Dante like started to cry and like I didn't know what to do so like I said "Hey Dante, Muffin, wanna make out?"

Prose Poem 2


Do you think that the stars are really loved ones looking down on us? I'd like to agree with Mufasa. I'd like to think that they brighten the night so the small children won't be afraid of the dark, so that we can make it home safely from late night drives. Do you think your animals are there as well? They were once considered a loved one. Maybe they look down on you when you have a new pet, happy that they once were able to be with you.

2/20/12- Prose Poem

Difference between men and women


Men are strong, pigheaded, loud, dominating, and controlling.
Women are strong, impatient, pushovers, crazy, and unsuccessful.
Men can do whatever and whoever whenever.
Women care what others think so they ask permission first.
Men are two-faced. Saying "I Love You" but telling his "bros" she's just a lay.
Women love hard. And fall in love even harder.
Men don't care.
Women care too much.

2/17/12- Write a letter that would never get published

Dear Maxim Magazine,

Your sex and relationships section is sometimes interesting... until I read Forbidden Sex Equals Super Hot Sex. Seriously, who does some of those things? Some of that is really messed up and I can't even imagine someone stooping that low. Why would you publish something like that? You shouldn't help those people take pride in the things they did. I'm sure no one would go as low to sleep with their girlfriend's sister but hey there are a lot of pigs in this world. So how about next time you make an unforbidden sex section? Instead of a section that gives other pigs out there even more ideas. 

Sincerely,

Someone who hates pigs

2/10/12- Prose Exercise

Paradise


McHotel has the biggest pool with an even bigger slide.
McHotel brings you room service at all times.
McHotel gives complimentary meals throughout the day.
McHotel makes a person never want to leave. Ever.
McHotel gives the softest bed and pillows.
McHotel makes people so content.
McHotel makes people book a room right away for next year.

Write a poem about things people collect- 2/8/12

Always on my Mind

Memories are always collected 

and remain on a person's mind.

From that first kiss to first relationship

to broken heart.

Pictures capture all these moments.

Capturing the smiles and tears, 

frowns and laughter.

Pictures set out, helping to reminisce

of the special moments that may be hard to remember.

Showing the happiness of a person that may no longer be around.

Pictures are collected and never let the memories fade.

2/6/12- Exercise 10.17

Outrageous General Pronouncement 

Don't you wish boyfriends never had exes?

You have to agree that all those girls are crazy.

Literally stalking him to see how much he really loves you.

Seeing if he's happier with that someone new.

Obviously you broke up for a reason.

That old girl needs to back off,

this is his new beginning.

Those drunk calls and texts she sends,

trying so hard to make amends.

Of course she still talks to his friends,

trying to get every detail out of them

but they never give in because they don't want her to win.

They always hated her, wanted that relationship to end.

She makes up all these stories

trying to make him seem so awful.

But honey, it's your fault he ran. 

Honestly you're just crazy.

End of story.

2/3/12- Exercise 10.16

Oh, you think you're better?

You flaunt your big house
and your bigger diamond rings.
Never keeping quiet like a mouse,
never realizing there's more important things.

I'm more down to earth
knowing the value of things isn't much worth.
I only say what I feel,
the attention doesn't feel real.

You always have a new guy
always going and telling him so many lies.
Thinking it's so cool that you cheat
in your fancy car, the back seat.

I prefer to be monogamous.
One guy for me is just fine.
I never will be labeled a whore,
compared to you I'll always be considered worth more.

I take pride in being down to earth.
Being outside accepting the world for all it's worth.

2/1/12- Poetry Prompt- What good is a day...?

What good is a day…

Without finding a direction.

You’ll be lost in space, but just a section.

Once you’re lost, everything can turn around.

You’ll begin an adventure trying to be found.

Your problem just became a solution,

So follow your instincts and find this institution.

It lies up above the stars, waiting for the days to pass you by,

Until you reached the end of your adventure,

And you meet the famous guy.

1/30/12- Replacement Poem, 10.10

from The Darker Sooner (The Best American Poetry pg. 157) 

Then came the lighter later,

came the earlier higher.

We will always be a bitter-there

angry-never-before. We were before never.

We were closer and closer.

Less was the remark we used for softer.

Found was our normal-carrier.

Our demons were lifted slower,

and lifted smaller.

The night was brighter, brighter

was triumph. Our exoneration was certain.

Instead of follower we had quieter,

instead of fighter, always. And under this bridge

built the summer's yellow climate.